Radiofrequency Ablation

We have an appointment this morning with a doctor from TTSH specialising in Radio Frequency Ablation (http://www.livertransplant.org/radiofrequencyablation.html):

Radiofrequency is a type of electrical energy that has been used in medical procedures for decades. At the most basic level, this electrical energy is used to create heat. The heat is created in a specific location, at a specific temperature, for a specific period of time, and ultimately results in the death of unwanted tissue.

During a radiofrequency procedure, an ablation probe is placed directly into the target tissue. An array of several small, curved electrodes are deployed from the end of the probe into the tissue. The generator is turned on and target temperatures are input. The radiofrequency energy flows through the electrodes, causing ionic agitation, and therefore friction, in the nearby tissue. This friction creates heat, and once sufficient temperatures have been reached, the heat kills the target tissue within a few minutes. Thermocouples (tiny thermometers) incorporated into the tips of the electrodes allow continuous monitoring of tissue temperatures, and power is automatically adjusted so that the target temperatures remain constant. Ultrasound is typically used to monitor the treatment process.

Heat is a very effective means of killing tissue. As tissue temperature rises above 113° F (50° C), protein is permanently damaged and cell membranes fuse. The process is rapid, typically requiring less than 10-15 minutes exposure time for a 3 cm ablation.

Depending on the power applied and the resistance of the tissues, heat decreases rapidly at a specific distance from the electrode tip, limiting the ablation size. The size of the ablated area is determined largely by the size of the probe, the temperature of the tissue, and the duration of time the energy is applied. There is a sharp boundary between dead tissue and unaffected surrounding tissue. Thus unwanted tissue can be ablated without much sacrifice of surrounding normal tissue.

What is an RF Procedure Like?

Your physician can tell you what to expect before and after the procedure. There are several different ways that a RF procedure may be performed, and each has different benefits, limitations, and applicability. Your physician can determine which is most suitable for you.
One option is a percutaneous approach, in which the electrode is inserted through the skin to the desired location. The physician usually uses ultrasound to guide the needle to the right location. This is the least invasive way that RF is performed. General anesthesia is usually not necessary, but typically the patient is sedated. Often the patient is able to go home the same day.
If general anesthesia is not used, some discomfort or pain may be felt while the area is being ablated.

Radio Frequency can be used for a number of uses as we understood from our ENT specialist. From treating snoring to face lifting even.

Appreciate your continued prayers on our decision making.

At Least We Have our Health

How many times have you heard the aforementioned response after someone has experienced a severe hardship? Most of us can weather nearly any storm as long as we can have the stamina to withstand it. On the heels of a bankruptcy, we can do without a new car or a family vacation. After being laid off from our job, we can tighten the financial belt a little tighter and skip going out to eat as much. But what do you do when your body is buffeted by sickness and pain? How do you keep your hope intact? Wherein lies your secondary line of defense?

The mountains we face that take the form of sickness of disease touch us where we are most vulnerable. The ruthlessness of terminal illness or the relentlessness of chronic sickness can batter even the strongest man or woman into submission. Where can a person go to elude it?

It's no wonder Jesus' earthly ministry focused, to a great extent, on meeting the physical and emtotional needs of the people of his day. By healing the sick, Jesus touched people where God's love intersects with human experience. What many call a "power encounter" drew people closer to the Father.

Jesus healed people because He loved them. "And when Jesus went out He saw a great multitude; and He was moved with compassion for them, and healed their sick" (Matt 14:14) He didn't heal them because He owed it to them, He did it simply because He had compassion for them.

The good news is Jesus hasn't changed. "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever" (Heb 13:8) He is still moved with compassion when He sees us in pain, and He still heals today just as He did two thousand years ago.

We pray for healing, believing that God can and does heal. We relentlessly pursue Him with our request until we receive an answer. But we also trust Him. Faith and prayer move God, but the decision to heal still remains with Him. Sometimes God heals on this earth. Sometimes He doesn't. And we don't always know why. That's part of the mystery of God. Yet without prayer, no one would have the hope of encountering His divine intervention to remove their mountains of sickness and disease.

(Asbtract from Prayers to Move Your Mountains, Thomas Nelson Publishers pp. 202-3)

Good News!

Jo was a little apprehensive last nite regarding the appointment with our ENT specialist at TTSH (Tan Tock Seng Hospital) this afternoon, I said a prayer and gave her encouragement saying that I felt no "vibes" about this since our Saturday morning episode. I was quite calm about it because God had clearly spoken to me that all would be well... and so it was!

4pm - Our number flashed and we walked into Dr Yeak's room. We were greeted by his usual smile and warmth and "Hi Joanne." He was in no rush to scope Jo's nose as yet and began chatting with her on the ongoings of the past year and half (that's when we last met in Apr 2005) Dr Yeak was always in praise of how clean Jo's nose had been right from post radiotheraphy treatment in 2002 till last year. She'd always been diligent in douching her nose daily to clear it of unwanted mucus buildup.

After chatting for about 5 mins, he sat Jo down on a reclining chair and sprayed some mild anasthesia and begun the scope. The "tool" used is actually a video scope consisting of a fiber optic camera at the end of a flexible tube some 60cm long. The video scope was then inserted into Jo's nostrils and displayed on a TV screen for all to view. I saw mucus and some swollen blood vessels but other than that Doc said that there was nothing else abnormal about it.

"Thank you God!" I shouted inside, and sensing likewise Jo's same reaction even though her eyes were closed. It's not a comfortable thing to have a tube shoved down your nose, that's for sure. Subsequently Dr Yeak used another receptable - a long metal tube with suction like a mini vacuum cleaner to suck out the mucus from Jo's sinus area. On completion of this, he said that there was mild infection and prescribed some antibiotics.

We left TTSH elated and thankful for what God had done once again.

"The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped." Psalms 28:7

Loooong Day

It sure was a long day today (Saturday).

Had gotten just about 4 hrs sleep in the last 48 hours and still it didn't stop me from catching the fantastic 3-0 thrashing of Sheffied United by my favourite EPL team - The Gunners! Go gunners go!

Jo's nose bleed had truly stopped and we were really thankful. She normally has to douche her nose nightly to clear the mucus buildup. This all happened after her radiotheraphy treatment in 2001. Since she couldn't clear her nose in the normal manner, she tried to cough up the phlegm build up - and lo and behold a blot of clot blood came splat out. No panick as this was simply the dried up blood from the back of her throat accumulated since last evening.

We went over to Jo's (her good friend) place for some dinner and soccer. Definitely was a good break from yeterday's early morning harrowing experience. Thanks Jo and Mok for the hospitality.

Time to hit the sack...she's sleeping so soundly...Thank you Lord for having sustained us through the day.

Nose Bleed!

It's strange how fast events can take a turn...from joyful celebration to intense anxiety...

At 1215am, an hour after we blogged our last entry - Jo complained of bleeding in her right nostril. I thought this was quite normal and we tried to suppress it by tilting her head and drinking fluids etc etc. We barely had 2 hours of sleep when she woke me at 230am saying that the bleeding wasn't stopping.

We immediately knew that she once again would have to be admitted to A&E at SGH for a quick check up. We packed quickly and set off. She was ushered into the Triage where a nurse took down the details of the symptoms. About 10 mins later she was whisked into the A&E room for assessment. I waited for awhile and then walked in to find out how she was. The doctors had managed to suppress the bleeding by then, thank God! They had put an ice pack and got her to pinch her nose continuously to ensure the blood clot. She had blood extracted for a test too.

At 4am she was moved to the Observation Ward to be observed till about 7am. All was fine so far and no further bleeding occured. Amen! Doc subsequently discharged her and said that the blood test proved negative for anaemia symptoms.

We'll need to make an appointment to see Dr Yeak, her ENT specialist at Tan Tock Seng Hospital (TTSH) sometime either Monday or Tuesday to ensure this is nothing serious.

It's 945am now. She's fast asleep and exhausted.

It all happened so so fast...

Lord please watch over her, heal her and restore her. Let this not be anything serious.

Happy Birthday Joanne!

My wife turned ..... oops... today. Nearly spilled the beans. Anyway what's in an age really? Just mere numbers to me. I'm 35 this year and she's 1 year older ok. So there you go.

il Lido
We arrived at il Lido, a fine dining Italian restaurant at the Sentosa Golf Club, at 6.40pm this evening. Just managing to catch the fading bits of a beautiful sunset. We'd requested for an outdoor seating and the ambience was very pleasant. Even the many tankers and freighters dotting the horizon became less of an eye-sore as it grew darker and colourful lights on the ships lit up the sea.

The staff was quite attentive and took our orders efficiently. Munching on a huge bowl of yummy, super-thin, savoury toasts (could taste bits of garlic and sea salt), we settled in comfortably and admired the designer decor which featured Philippe Stark ghost chairs and colourful windmill-like standing fans.

The food came relatively quickly as there were not many diners yet. Jo had ordered the gourmet set dinner which included an appetiser of roasted goose liver with poached pear and fennel, homemade tagliolini with lobster in tomato sauce, beef tenderloin with mushroom and mashed potato, filo pastry with molten chocolate and ice-cream, and coffee. But she'd decided that she would prefer to have the duck leg confit with baby spinach and balsamic vinegar for main course, so I took her beef dish and added a seafood soup.

The soup was chock-a-block with scrumptious chunks of seafood and tasted just right. And I really enjoyed the beef tenderloin which was nicely seared on the outside and juicy and pink on the inside. I also slurped up most of Jo's lobster pasta (quite delicious but tasted rather like mini mee pok, hee hee...) as she was quite overwhelmed by the very rich goose liver appetiser. Jo shared some of her duck confit with me and we both loved it! She even said it tasted like roast pork, with the crispy skin and succulent meat.

By this time, we were so stuffed we were about to roll off our chairs but we still had to wait for the dessert which took a while to prepare (in fact, the staff told us they had to re-do our dessert cos the first one didn't bake properly, high standards ya?). In the meantime, we witnessed 3 birthdays being celebrated as the staff brought a cake to different tables and sang slightly off-tune birthday songs. Jo and I both agreed that we don't really want the attention so we kept mum about her birthday.

The dessert was nicely presented and tasted ok but didn't knock our socks off. When we left about 8.30pm, the restaurant was almost full. We drove round to the beach carpark, hoping to take a leisurely stroll by the beach. But decided to go home after seeing all the hoardings and construction equipment set up around that area.

All in all, it was a very enjoyable and relaxing evening. And Sentosa is actually just 10 minutes away from our house, plus you get free entry if you dine at il Lido. So it's definitely gonna stay on our radar for future special occasions.

PS: You may have guessed that Jo wrote the paragraphs describing the food : )

The Potter's Hand

I have been an ardent follower of the contemporary Christian music scene since I was a kid. Listening to the Maranatha series and now with the likes of Hillsongs, Parachute Band, Matt Redman and many others. I get most of my stuff from SKS Bookstore http://www.sksbooks.com or from Life Bookshop http://www.lifebookshop.com.sg From time to time I'd like to share with you the songs that have really touched my heart and meant alot to me:

The Potter's Hand

Beautiful Lord, wonderful Saviour
I know for sure all of my days are held in Your hand.
Crafted into Your perfect plan.

You gently call me into Your presence
Guiding me by Your Holy Spirit, teach me dear Lord.
To live all of my life through your eyes.

I'm captured by Your holy calling
Set me apart, I know You're drawing me to Yourself
Lead me Lord, I pray.

CHORUS:
Take me, mold me, use me, fill me,
I give my life to the Potter's hand.
Call me, guide me, lead me, walk beside me
I give my life, to the Potter's hand.

©1997 Darlene Zschech / Hillsongs Australia
Words and Music by Darlene Zschech

Blessings x 5

Once again, we're reassured that God's blessings come in multiples and at His perfect timing!

The NUH doctor - Dr Goh - we met on Mon morning turned out to be our fren's uncle whom we had consulted in Feb 2004 for a 2nd opinion when my cancer came back. Amazingly, he recognised me and Alex too.

We sat down rather apprehensively, waiting to hear more details about the trial treatment option which my NCC onco had mentioned. But guess what, Dr Goh had in fact prepared a list of FIVE possible treatment options for me! Praise God indeed!

Here're the possible treatments (in simplified terms, as far as I could understand):

1. Inject chemo or radiation directly into tumour, which will kill the tumour from inside. Involves day surgery.
2. Infuse a non-chemo drug into body which interferes with growth of cancer cells, eventually leading to death of cancer cells.
3. Take a non-chemo drug in oral tablet form which inhibits growth of abnormal blood vessels supplying to tumour, therefore starving tumour to death.
4. Infuse a non-chemo drug which inhibits growth of abnormal blood vessels supplying to tumour, therefore starving tumour to death.
5. Participate in a clinical trial for a new non-chemo drug which treats cancer by interrupting the process of blood vessel production in the tumour.

For the next 30-40 minutes, Dr Goh patiently went through all the options, answering our 1001 questions, even printing out information for us to take home with the list of treatment options, so we can think through and decide which one to go for. Truly, Dr Goh is such a blessing to cancer patients because he is so positive and caring. Even when he looked at my latest CT scans, he told me I'm doing well as the tumour (though big) is mainly at the top of the right-side of my liver, and that the left-side of my liver which is supporting my body functions looks CLEAR : )

So we now have 1 week to decide which treatment to go for and we're definitely committing this matter into God's hands. We pray for His guidance and strength, and we pray that once we make the decision, we will have the courage and perseverance to see it through.

Surprise!

After her bout of prolonged fever on Saturday night, Jo slept in on Sunday morning and had to miss going to Sunday School :( She was disappointed but little did she know, come that afternoon, Angeline and the rest of the JC Kinders Sunday School teachers would stage a surprise celebration at Angeline's home. I was part of the conspiracy but played an insignificant role of guaranteeing that Jo would be present.

What actually happened...
After Church, I picked Jo up from home and left for Angeline's place about 2.30pm. Having parked the car, we walked up to her gate and pressed the bell. We heard lotsa commotion going on but no one came to open the gate and door. After Jo pressed the bell a few more times, thinking it's spoilt, Angeline finally appeared with a smirk saying,"Sorry ah, so busy eating and chatting..." Jo walked through the main door... and was spontaneously greeted with loud popping sounds and colourful paper streamers from party crackers fired by the SS teachers! (Earlier commotion was Angeline giving instructions to teachers to find the missing party crackers and subsequently directing everyone into their standby position!) Jo was truly overwhelmed as she totally didn't expect this at all. Her frens presented her with a generous birthday ang-pow and a funky vase filled with colourful "stuffed" flowers, decorated with pretty personalised handwritten notes ... beautiful and ideal for her since it doesn't need water and upkeep :)

And keeping up with tradition, her dear frens specially ordered her favourite butter cream chocolate cake from a bakery @ Sunset Way. We also celebrated Viola's birthday at the same time.

Thanks to our wonderful host Angeline, there was enough food to feed an army. Spizza pizzas, steamboat with every ingredient you can think of, followed by home-made scones (baked by Angeline) served with jam and cream, Thai desserts, and fruits (grapes and Christmas-tree-shaped watermelon!). Not forgetting the endless supply of icy cold Snapple drinks. Totally decadent!

Big thanks
Jo and I are truly touched and encouraged by the love, care and concern showered upon us by the lovely ladies and gentlemen from JC Kinders, including those who were not able to attend the lunch. Thanks a million and God bless!

Saturday Night Fever

Had my morning ride at ECP with the rest of the gang as usual. We rode for 42km from Fort Road Car Park B1 to Changi Village and back..you should try cycling! :)

Wild Rocket @ Mt Emily Hotel
Lunch was at a quaint restaurant tucked away at Mt Emily Road (just up the road from Peace Centre and next to Mt Sophia Road) Jo had some fish thingy (which she loved!), Jessica (her sis) had some penne pasta thingy and I had a crab linguine set. Not bad at all. After that she decided to can her shopping trip due to her fever coming on...

Saturday Night Fever
Talking about fever, it's 10:44pm now and we had to rush back from dinner at Long Beach Seafood Restaurant @ Marina South. Brother and myself had planned this dinner for our cousins from KL who'd driven in on Thursday. I thought at first she'd just gotten a chill after the dishes were served...then she told me she was shivering and it struck me that this was not right. We said a hasty farewell to our cousins (Philip, Christina and Nicky) at the table and drove dad back to Braddell before returning home.

She took her temperature the moment we got back and it read 38.6 degrees! She rushed to take a hot bath, got changed and settled into bed. She was still shivering and I had to use the hair dryer to warm her up!

If you don't already know by now, Jo's fever is chronic at this point. She takes panadol daily because the fever comes by every 8-10 hours. So far it seems as the fever has been recurring sooner, please pray with me...

"Dear Lord please remove this chronic fever that she'll not have to suffer the discomfort any further. Please show her your love and mercy and restore her in your own time. We ask for your Holy Spirit to continue to protect and watch over her and thwart and evil influence over her. In Jesus name we pray, Amen."

Dear Lord, all I ask daily is for Jo to continue to lead as normal a life as possible...

"It Didn't Help"

Dr Leong said as we sat down in her room. It was a long wait today before we got to see her. She showed us the CT scan images on her PC and said that the tumour didn't shrink but looked "stable". I guess at this moment Jo and I were both about to ask her "what's next" when she whipped out a notepad and pen to list down all the previous "cocktails" Jo's had since Feb 2004...quite a few (6-7 different chemo drugs) I must say. Dr Leong showed us 2 chemo options available:

Chemo 1 is simple and basic, having minimal side effects and short treatment time weekly, lasting approx. 30 mins.

Chemo 2 is complex and would last 6-8 hours weekly. Severe side effects possibly affecting the bladder among other organs.

While we were mulling over the 2 options, Dr Leong managed to contact via phone a fellow onco at the NUH (she had left several messages for him since she saw Jo's results). She then informed us of another treatment (trial) option which was being offered there. This treatment could either be administered by tablet or injection. We don't have much information as yet till we meet with the onco on Monday @ 10am.

So there you go, we survived the news. I think Jo was pretty calm overall, much more than I was. She said that she wasn't really that anxious. God's peace I reckon.

Even though we were disappointed that the tumour hasn't shrunk, we want to give thanks...

1. that the tumour hasn't really grown and
2. that we have this other treatment option available...
3. more importantly, as Jo gets a few more days of chemo-free rest,
4. for all your support and prayer cover

There's always something to be thankful for even when the situation doesn't seem to warrant it.
God Bless.

CT Scan Results Today @ 3pm

Appreciate your prayers once again as we await results this afternoon. It's always really agonising when you don't know the unknown...no matter how many times you've gone
through it. But we remember that we're never alone...

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous, do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." Joshua 1:9

The bright side of things is that yesterday's CT Scan procedure when through very smoothly. There was little pain and nurses were able to find her vein quite well. After that, over to TCM @ Paragon as usual. She was given her usual brown powder stuff and home we went.

The Weekend

We had an eventful Sunday as usual. Jo managed to attend Sunday School after a loooong absence while I was as usual having a handful with my YM (Youth Ministry) "kids". Even before church, Jo had already decided that lunch will be at Tiong Bahru food centre fulfilling her char-siew mee craving. Alas it was not to be. Arriving there at 1:50pm, the stall was apparently "out of stock" of their char siew and other food ingredients..."come back in 2 hours", the stall holder told us ... and Jo looked at me thinking "seow ah" :)

Anyway we were having lunch with the Foos and our god-daughter Rebecca who was just a livewire talking about everything she's been doing over the past week ... I think? She's always so engaging, animated and expressive - her big eyes and her wild hand gestures just really captivate you. She's such a joy to be with and of course not forgetting the parents too, David and Jennifer... hee hee.

Shalom Bible Study (BS)
We had our Shalom Small Group (SG) Bible Study this evening continuing on the book of James.
We had a nice Italian dinner consisting of: Spizza pizzas (Pizza Hut is taboo food to us), Ketti's hearty minestrone and homemade garlic toast, Mei's fantastic beefy spaghetti and Jenny's honeydew balls with nata de coco + aloe vera dessert.

Today we covered James 1:19-27 on Listening & Doing. Our study focused on the relationship between hearing God's Word, and putting it into practice in our lives. Key lessons:

a. "Quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger" v.19 - the Bible commends the value of listening and the danger of hasty speech. One needs to consider carefully what is to be said, rather then impulsively launching into words that are not wise.

b. "..ridding yourselves of all moral filth and evil excess" v.21 - to be in tune with God's purpose requires us to reject and lay aside moral uncleanness.

c. "But be doers of the word and not hearers only" v.22 - the crux of James point within this passage. The Christian must not only hear the word BUT importantly ACT upon it...a response is needed.

d. v.26-27 James goes on to highlight the marks of a true Christian are:
1. Through his Speech - the ability to control the tongue
2. The willingness to engage in charity
3. The continuous pursuit of Holiness

No Trip This Weekend

Jo's been doing fine so far apart from the pain at her liver area. You know I mentioned on Tues that during her rest week we would try to travel somewhere nearby? Well we can' t this week due to the pain. Anyway the flight to Redang was fully booked, if not we would be at Seletar Airport in 3 hrs time...sob! sob!

As usual she's been hanging out with friends this week...thanks again folks! Hmmm, on Wed she was with Angeline (Sunday School) for High Tea @ Goodwood Park Hotel. Thank goodness she made reservations caused they had the only table there reserved for them. I don't know what woman can talk about but they were chatting from 2pm to 6pm... :) Thanks Angeline!

Yesterday she was with her ex-Edelman boss and colleague @ the SRC (Singapore Recreation Club) for dinner while I was whacking the daylights out of shuttlecocks at my weekly badminton sessions @ Whampoa CC.

Today another old friend will be "taopaoing" her lunch.

Tonight, I've got a night ride planned from West Coast to Tuas (Secondlink) with a few crazy friends @ 7:30pm.

So what we gonna do over the weekend, hmmm... meet up with more friends I guess.

Jesus Is Your Way

"Experiencing God" by Henry Blackaby http://www.blackaby.org/resources/has been one of the cornerstone Christian books I hold dearly to and is worth reading over and over again. The book shows you how to deepen your relationship with Him and that God reveals Himself to each of us in special and exceptional ways. The following is a transcript from p.33-34:

Often people approach knowing and doing God's will this way: They ask,"Lord, what do you want me to do? When do You want me to do it? How shall I do it? Where shall I do it? What will the outcome be?"

Isn't this response most typical of us? We are always asking God for a detailed "road map." We say,"Lord, if You could just tell me where I am heading, then I will be able to set my course and go."

He says,"You don't need to. What you need to do is follow Me one day at a time." We need to come to the place where our response to God will be:"Lord, just tell me what to do one step at a time, and I will do it."

Who is the one who really knows the way for you to fulfill God's purpose for your life? God is! Jesus said,"I am the way, the truth, and the life" (John 14:6)

• He did not say,"I will show you the way."
• He did not say,"I will give you a road map."
• He did not say,"I will tell you which direction to head."
• He said,"I am the way." Jesus knows the way, he is your way.

If you were to do everything one day at a time, you always would be right in the center of where God wants you to be. Can you trust God to guide you that way? You might say,"No, Jesus does not really know God's will for my life." But He does! Jesus is God. You might say,"No, Jesus might mislead me and take me the wrong way." But He won't. You might think that Jesus would rather you wait until He tells you all the details before you follow Him. But that is not the pattern we see in His life or in the Scriptures.

God would be more interested in your responding to Him this way:"Yes, if I follow Jesus one day at a time, I will be right in the center of Your will for my life." When you get to the place where you trust Jesus to guide you one step at a time, you experience a new freedom. If you don't trust Jesus to guide you this way, what happens if you don't know the way to go? You worry every time you must make a turn. You often freeze up and cannot make a decision. This is not the way God intends for you to live your life.

Likewise, I have found that this statement holds true for me. When you release your life to Him, you become the center of His will and hear His heartbeat even better.

This Morning...(Tuesday)

2:15am: after reading a short passage and praying for Jo, I tucked her into bed. As I started my own bout of prayer, she shrieked out in pain "owww, ow, ouch" I immediately jumped out of bed, turned on the lights and turned to her. She was clutching her tummy.

I asked her what's causing the pain, she said "sharp sharp" pointing at her liver area. I froze for a split second just totally dumbfounded, sweating and at a total loss. She had apparently touched her tummy area and somehow this searing pain erupted. I got her to stand and just stay still for awhile...and after sometime, the pain subsided. Amen. She said that it must have been the bloatedness that caused the muscle / tissue near her colon area to be enlarged making it very tender to touch. After sometime, I laid her down to sleep again and she slept quite well.

Flashback: SGH Hospitalisation (3-5 July 2006)
This incident was almost identical to the recent hospitalisation in July (3rd to 5th). The night of 2 July, she had had some rambutans for dessert after dinner. Subsequently she went to sleep normally and later on when waking up to go to the toilet - felt an excruciating pain in the same colon / liver area. We thot it was something else and let it be till the morning. I called our Onco first thing waking up and she said to best check into SGH. Somehow she was constipating so much (due to the chemo) that there was severe bloatedness at her tummy. She hadn't gone to the toilet to pass motion for nearly 5-6 days that time.

At NCC & SGH, doctors did the scan and blood test as usual. Thank God it was not a rupture of the liver, which could have been a small possibility as suggested by our Onco. As usual we checked into Ward 78 - really quiet and peaceful. Doctors gave her all kinds of laxatives to help release her bowels, but to no avail. The poor girl finally had to be assisted by a doctor to physically remove her bowels on the bed. Doctor said that there was blockage at the anus area and therefore this had to be done. After this, her bowels were back to normal and she was eating fine. Sheesh, I can only say that my wife has gone through it all...with this ordeal. I can't even begin to imagine if it were me. We thank God that it was really not anything worse than we envisage.

Strangely we both agreed that the stay at Ward 78 was quite enjoyable due to the serenity (morbid you might think :) It provided me time to reflect and to refocus my energies into prayer once again.

Treatment Updates

This week is Jo's rest week which means we will be planning to go away over the weekend if possible. We were planning initially for Pulau Redang unfortunately there was no space available on Berjaya Air for Friday's departure...sob sob! She is now considering Pulau Rawa just off Mersing, if not Bintan or Bali also possible options. The main priority is a nice white sandy beach and secondary pre-requisite - an equivalently "nice" hotel or resort.

Treatment Updates
11 Sept, Monday - CT Scan @ 2pm
12 Sept, Tuesday - Meet up with Onco.

Prayer items for this and next week:
a. That the CT Scan would have shown improvement / reduction of the tumour
b. That her appetite improves. Still eating quite minimal and her weight is hovering at 41-42kg. Not good.
c. That the CT Scan goes smoothly and the nurse would be able to locate her veins easily.
d. That there would be as little discomfort and pain during this process
e. There her stomach is able to digest what she eats daily efficiently. Currently it takes awhile for her to digest the food after each meal, causing bloatedness and pain at the stomach area.
f. That her fever will not recur so frequently daily.

Thank you Prayer Warriors for your continued prayer support. God Bless!

ENREACH – Final Day, Sept 3rd

So, in a blink of an eye the retreat is over and we’re right back into the routine of our daily living…or have we? One thing’s for sure - we’ve come out “enriched” and changed for the better.

In our final Small Group Activity, we were asked to write and/or draw our actions on a good and bad day. This is from Jo:

Bad Days:
"When I have no appetite"
"When I have to restrain myself from eating my favourite foods" (ie. Bak kwa, char kway teow, laksa, satay…list goes on and on)
"One day before I go for chemo or CT Scan"
"When I feel I can’t plan for the future"

Good Days:
"Pray to God and commit everything into His hands"
"Pour out everything to Alex and discuss possible solutions"
"Talk to close girlfriends"
"Do a new interesting activity" (i.e travel and try new foods/restaurants etc)
"Go to Sunday School and collect hugs from kids"

Writing down stuff like that can be quite daunting actually because it makes you stare reality in the face (bad days)…I hate that. But the positive thing is that it makes you more aware of how precious the Good days are and that planning is sometimes to make each of these days the best!

What we learned or was reinforced:
- Count your blessings each day for there are many who are much less fortunate than we are.
- Live each day at a time and take time to smell the roses.
- You lose nothing in giving of yourself to others.
- Crying is absolutely fine…
- We need to continuously draw strength from our “anchors”
- Keep yourself occupied
- Always ask and seek help
- Stay positive

We want to say our hearty thanks to Judy and her fantastic NCC team and beyond for having organised such a wonderful programme.

Our group Lilies was truly an amazing group made up of:
A father and son, mother and daughter, 2 wonderful friends, a brave responsible father and 2 excellent facilitators. Thank you Simon, Gerald, Janice, Joyce, Persis, Siew Hong, Poh Leng, Anita and Serene for sharing your lives with us and for being so positive.

ENREACH - Day 2, Sept 2

Woke up at 8:00am. Jo complained of pains at her tummy area - she must have overeatened yesterday with 2 full buffet meals within hours of each other. Got to make sure she cools down.

Small Group Sharing (9:00 - 11:30am) - "Reconstructing My Life"
Long but interesting sharing session based on a scenario whereby we were stranded on an island and what our reactions and actions would be...

"TCM" (12noon - 1:30pm)
Interesting speaker who was first a GP and now a practicing TCM Specialist. A real mixture
of east & west.

"The Law and You" (3:00 - 4:30pm)
Boring speaker...about wills and stuff.

Lucky Draw (5:15pm)
Jo won a lucky draw prize - basket of Biotene dry mouth stuff.

Surprise Drive (5:40pm)
It was really amazing to see some 30 Mazdas lined up front at the hotel driveway waiting to usher us all to a drive around Marina South and back. Excellent novel idea. Jo went in a dark blue Miata...I decided to wait.

Dinner (7:00pm)
Dinner again...yeah. We've been eating, eating and eating. Also there were belly dancers, a live
band and lotsa music. Really nice to see the oldies and not so old dancing to waltz, cha cha and rock & roll. We were kinda sedated just seated right up front. By the way we came down late cause we kinda got knocked out between 6:30 - 7:45pm. So very tired from the non stop events today.

ENREACH - Day 1, Sept 1

Jo sat in for the afternoon session on Evidence-based Nutrition (as I was back in camp for recall briefing in the afternoon). Very informational and lasted some 90 minutes. After our buffet dinner, we started our first Small Group Sharing: "Rediscovering Myself"

Our group was called "Lilies" and had 9 participants: 5 patients and 4 caregivers + 2 facilitators. We found it very effective as all of us shared from our hearts what we've faced and gone through. We shared on:
- What changes in lifestyles were made
- The good things that came out from the cancer journey
- How we coped with it

All in all a rather personal sharing session, but we found it highly inspiring and effective listening and learning from other patients and caregivers. One of the key messages running through the participant's responses was about God and how He was the One sustaining them. We found out also that most of them are Christians! Amen!

We've got a long day ahead tomorrow...and I'd like to see how Jo wakes up at 730am! :)